‘It’s left men and women on a never-ending hunt for the perfect partner, thinking: “A few more dates and I’ll find The One.” In my work, I’ve met plenty of women who think there’s always a better guy out there.‘The danger is that it results in a string of meaningless flings.Apart from the risk of sexually transmitted disease, ultimately a never-ending quest for grass that’s greener means that women (and men) don’t face the realities of relationships.
While she had plenty of male friends, nothing developed romantically, so she signed up to a dating site. But they got back together, probably when he first disappeared, and later he wanted a bit on the side.‘Some are upfront, but many are not honest.
There are men who say they’re looking for a serious relationship, but when you chat online it becomes clear they don’t or they’ve already got a partner.
They’ll write anything women want to hear on their profile.’ She admits she found internet dating addictive.‘It’s exciting when you get an email in the morning that says you’ve had 20 views. Unfortunately, you then look at who’s shown interest and your heart sinks.
But it still encourages you to think that if you keep going, there’s got to be someone better next time.’‘The websites ask for your preferences on height, weight, hair colour and even eye colour.
In the real world, a person is a package and you might not notice their eye colour, but online you cross off people for the most base physical reasons.
You become judgmental.’Professor Harry Reis, who led the research into the efficacy of internet dating, said that skimming over the profiles and pictures of hundreds of potential mates encouraged a ‘shopping’ mentality.Another issue is that singletons who spend weeks or even months emailing a potential mate before meeting them often have unrealistic expectations.‘Also, he’s unlike any man I’d gone for before.Bod wants to make it easier to escape an awful date–by immediately letting you leave for a better one.Over the past decade, she’s tried ten websites, had dates with 40 men and chatted — online or over the phone — to countless other potential suitors.But after one serious heartbreak and hundreds of pounds spent on subscription fees, love still eludes her.‘In many ways, internet dating is a great way to meet people, but it’s such a whirlwind of highs and lows,’ she says.‘I’ve met some lovely men, but I’ve also met many who lied about themselves and their intentions.’Her experiences are mirrored by many women, who find that internet dating is great if you want a casual fling, but not for anything longer lasting because there are so many dishonest men seeking cheap thrills.